As soon as Harriet entered the building, she headed for the seventh floor. She knew that the witch that had ruined her life would be in apartment 24 G.
#
Her problems started in utero, when her parents cut in front of a woman at a cross walk, which to be fair was rude on that part. In Harriet’s opinion, however, it didn’t justify what happened next. Before anyone could do anything, she put both her hands on Harriet’s mother’s belly and started rambling in Latin. Her dad pulled her mom away and got them away from the situation and that was that. At least until a few hours after Harriet was born when she was kidnapped from the hospital by an Aztec god-worshipping cult for no apparent reason. And since something killed all the cultist, leaving baby Harriet the only survivor, they would never know why they picked her out, at least this side of eternity.
However, as cyrtids, aliens, creepy dolls, other witches and the like were drawn to her for good or for ill-usually ill—they got the point. She had been cursed to have every paranormal entity in the world find its way to her like a heat-seeking missile. And it turned out pretty much everything they told you wasn’t real, was. By the age of eighteen she had been abducted by at least two different species of alien, nearly eaten by ogres and orcs, attacked by bigfoot (ending her brief stint in girl scouts), and the family had to move three times due to monovalent hauntings. Okay, the last time it was more annoying than threatening. But still, you get the picture.
#
For Harriet, things came to a head two days after her eighteenth birthday. She just wanted some fresh air after the cake was cut and distributed. That was all she wanted.
The street was quiet, with everyone inside for the night. The streetlights were on, giving everything a pale blue glow. It was beautiful.
Then a shadow blocked out the glow, illuminating the street with an eerie green light of its own. A familiar alarm running through her, Harriet looked up and saw a giant 1950s SF film saucer overhead.
Crap. Not again! Knowing where this was going, Harriet bolted for the door, as if that could save her, but suddenly felt herself unable to move, her heart pounding as her world became tinted in the green of the tractor beam light.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no… The word echoed through her mind as she rose into the air, kicking and failing as if that would help the situation, her home drifting farther away by the second. It was that word that rang out in her mind before everything went black.
#
She woke up to a world of sterile white. At first, she didn’t move, then realized there wasn’t a forcefield holding her in place like the last time. She tried to sit up only to feel a jerk as she stopped first and noticed the first feelings of cold metal on her wrists.
She looked down to see both wrists in metal cuffs. Instinctively, she began to struggle against the restraints, trying to fight the tears that were welling up in her eyes.
Within seconds three humanoid beings with dappled grey skin large eyes with human-like white sclera but either magenta or salmon irises, and thin, lipless mouths. All three were dressed in blue unforms. One of them started talking to the others and one handed him a metal tube.
“Get that freaking thing the freak away from me!” Harriet screamed, panicked, and enraged at the same time, franticly pulling at the restraints.
Pausing, the creatures looked at each other in surprise it seemed, chattering in a language Harriet couldn’t understand, before walking off again.
“Hey!” Harriet called out, “You’re just gonna leave me here?! Seriously?!” She pulled at the restraints, deciding she didn’t want to be there when they got back.
Despite her efforts, he was still there when they returned, this time accompanied by an alien with a blocky device wrapped around its face. It turned at the knobs on the device for a few moments, then a scratchy male voice came out. “Uh…Hello?”
For some reason, that was what did it. That would be forever known as the moment Harriet Mondeli snapped.
“Hello?” Harriet repeated in anger and disbelief, “You people kidnapped me, strapped me to this table like some animal, come at me with some probe and that’s all you have to say?! ‘Hello’?”
“Yes, well about that,” The translator responded awkwardly, “There’s seems to have been a terrible misunderstanding; we didn’t realize that you were sentient.”
#
They were quite embarrassed about this blunder. They wouldn’t stop apologizing the whole way back, gently landing on the lawn this time before letting her out. “Again, Miss,” The translator continued, walking her out the door, “Let me just re-iterate how terribly sorry we are all about—”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” Harriet cut him off, unimpressed as she walked off.
As they took off, destroying several lawn ornaments and blowing wind everywhere, Harriet’s mother rushed out of the house.
“Harriet!” Suddenly Harriet found herself engulfed in the mustard yellow fabric of her mother’s shirt as the woman embraced the teen. When she finally pulled back, Harriet found herself staring into her own pale brown-hazel eyes. “Honey, how badly did they hurt you?”
“They didn’t, believe it or not,” Harriet said, walking off towards the porch.
“Honey…” Her mom called out, running after her.
Just as she got to the door, Harriet whirled around, “Mom, I had some time to think while they were bringing me back and I know what I want for my birthday.”
Her mother responded by coming to a sudden stop. “Hattie, I know you’ve just been through a lot but…”
“I’m not trying to avoid talking about it.” Harriet cut her off, seeing where this was going, “I just don’t want it to happen again. Krav Maga lessons would be a good start. It won’t stop tractor beams, but it’s bound to be useful at some point. Also, what’s our state’s policy on carrying weapons?”
#
Two days later, Harriet was held up in her room, five different tabs open on her computer, and notebook on at her side. Now she was scribbling down observations she made about fey culture while being held captive in a fairy mound when there was a knock on the door. “Harriet,” He sister’s voice called out, “Can I come in?”
“Come on in, El.” Harriet called back. She needed to talk to her sister if this was going to work.
Her older sister stepped inside. Two years older than Harriet, Eloise and her little sister had a clear resemblance. Same vaguely heart-shaped faces straight out of central casting for a YA novel. Same brown hair, though Harriet’s was more wavey. But Eloise’s figure was just a bit shapelier.
“Hey,” Harriet greeted her, stetting the book and the laptop aside, “What’s up?”
“That’s what I was about to ask you,” Eloise replied, sitting on the edge of the bed, “Hattie, you haven’t been out of your room since your birthday except for coffee and food, and I’m not entirely convinced you’ve been sleeping. What happened in that ship?”
“Nothing.” Harriet said, “I’ve just been busy planning. Which, I’m going to need your help with by the way.”
Eloise’s eyes winded slightly and her face contorted with concern. “Planning what?”
“To take my life back.” Harriet announced, switching tabs, “I found a Krav Maga class at a gym in the city, but I’m going to need rides. Do you mind taking me?”
“When is it?” Eloise squeaked, feeling her throat constrict ever so slightly.
“Four o’clock, five days a week.” Harriet said quickly, “Now, I know what you’re thinking, which leads me to my next point. I need you to help me get a car. Actually, I need you to help me get my license, and then a car. Probably something used, considering my funds consist of money from saved up from McDonalds, babysitting gigs and birthday.”
Eloise didn’t say anything for a moment, but Harriet could tell she was thinking about it.
“Please, El.” Harriet pleaded, “I can’t live like this anymore. I need to do something.”
“Okay.” Eloise gave in.
Overjoyed and pratically unable to believe this was really happening, Harriet squealed. “Thank, you Eloise!” She beamed, throwing herself at her sister, wrapping her arms around her neck, “Thank you, thank you, thank you! You don’t know what this means to me!”
“I think I have an idea.” Eloise responded, prying Harriet off her, “Now come on, no time like the present. Let’s go show you the basics before I have time to regret this.”
#
For the next three months, Harriet was on a mission. She had perfect attendance at the local Krav Maga class, and studied and practiced for her learner’s permit, then went out with Eloise every night to get enough experience to take the driver’s test. Then finally she got her license.
Now she just had to get the car.
It was one of those old station wagons with wood paneling on the sides, colored a sedate beige. Harriet would be the first to admit, she didn’t know that much about cars, but it seemed to be in okay condition.
“Can we take it for a test drive?” Harriet asked the man in the suit who was showing her the car, “Test drives, that’s a thing people actually do, right?”
The man just stared at her, looking perplexed. “Of course, we can take it for a test drive.”
The three of them got into the car, Harriet in the driver’s seat, the salesman in the passenger seat, Eloise in the back. Harriet started the car, which spit and sputtered, causing Harriet to eye the salesman suspiciously.
“I swear to you, it’s never done that before.” The salesman said.
“What’s that smell? Eloise asked suddenly, as a foul odor filled the car.
“That has happened before.” The salesman admitted reluctantly, “But it usually dissipates after a few minutes.”
The car may be noisy and smelly, but in the end, it held up well, and it was all Harriett could afford.
#
When her family found out the other reason she needed the car, they were less than thrilled.
“Look, if I’m going to keep preparing, I’m going to need money.” Harriet informed her parents and sister in the kitchen, “Besides, I’m eighteen. It’s about time I got a job.”
“Preparing for what?” Their mother demanded, “What has all this been for?”
Eloise decided to take a slightly different approach. “You remember what happened the last time you got a job, right? And that time you started your own babysitting service?”
Harriet did. She had been thirteen, bought one of those training kits from a girl’s magazine, started looking for referrals from neighbors. It went well until one family turned out to be part of the Knights Templar and she got caught in the middle between their war with the Hashshian. Another family turned out to be part of another cult and Harriet was nearly sacrificed again. Then a couple of years ago she got a job at MacDonalds only to lose it for too many unexplained absences. Because she couldn’t exactly tell them she had been abducted by aliens the one time and had accidentally walked into a fairy and was a fey noble’s exotic pet for a fortnight the time after that.
“I’ve thought of that.” Harriet admitted, “And I think I have a solution, at least a temporary one. Uber.”
You know how people say things get so quiet you could hear a pin drop? Well, that’s what happened. At least until their father deadpanned, “What?”
“Yeah, I looked it up, you can make your own hours, so if I’m kidnapped or lost in an enchanted forest, I won’t get fired for missing work, because I’m my own boss.” Harriet reasoned, sounding like she thought it was quite sensible. Because she did.
“And you could very well be kidnapped on the job!” Her mother exclaimed.
“Harriet, honey this job is dangerous from being who don’t have your condition.” Her father said, much more calmly.
“’Condition?’” Harriet repeated, “That’s what you call this? I’m literally cursed, Dad! Cursed!”
“Which is why becoming an Uber driver is just asking for trouble.” Her dad insisted.
“Look, I need funds for what I’m trying to do.” Harriet argued, not giving up, “Travel, resources, more training. And this is the only feasible way.”
“And what exactly is it that you’re trying to do?” Their mother spoke up, “The training the research, you won’t even tell us what it’s for. How can you expect us to agree to this when we don’t even know why?”
“Because I’m going to break the curse, okay?!” Harriet shouted, “I’m going to find the witch, and make her break the curse!”
#
It took a little more convincing, but eventually Harriet got her family on board. The first two weeks of her new job worked rather well. Payment didn’t work exactly as promised, but she was still making a fair bit of money, and she never missed a Krav Maga class.
And she figured out what was going on with the car.
She was spraying the interior again, trying to get it ready for her next pick up. Somehow the smell still seemed to permeate the car. “Oh, come on!” She shouted in frustration, kicking the side of the sedan.
Suddenly the car roared to life, unbidden, and flames started coming out from the engine.
“What?” Harriet balked, before realizing what was happening and franticly looking for anything to quell the flames with. “No, no, no, no, no, no…”
Out of nowhere, Eloise ran in holding a fire extinguisher, spraying it, sending white foam all over the place. After the dust cleared no one said anything for a moment then Harriet announced, “Yeah, my car has a poltergeist.”
#
Neither of them was sure how they got the car fixed in time—which added credence to Harriet’s poltergeist theory-but they got her ready to go. She was waiting outside when the door to car flung open and a slim man in a suit got into the back. “Ah, Taylor Harlow?” she asked, checking the picture of her rider.
“Yeah, just drive!” Taylor ordered quickly.
“Okay, so where were you wanting to go again…” Harriet asked, awkwardly, her eyes darting black and realizing they were being tailed, “Who is that?!”
“Just, go!” Taylor shouted, “I’ll give you directions!”
For the next fifteen minutes Taylor shouted directions to Harriet as they tried to evade the black car. Suddenly, in the middle of the chase, a bullet whizzed through the window, Harriet just ducking in the nick of time.
“Okay, I know what this may look like…” Taylor began.
“Who are you?” Harriet asked bluntly, “Why are they chasing us?”
Taylor seemed shocked by her reactions. “Wow, you are surprisingly calm right now.”
“That’s because this isn’t my first rodeo.” Harriet explained, piecing it together, “So who are you with? Templar Knights? Illuminati? You’re not—you wouldn’t happen to be a fairy, would you?” Maybe she could work with that. If he didn’t drag her into their realm, then all bets would be off.
“No!” Taylor shouted, sounding offended, “Okay, I’m with the Illuminati, they’re —actually not with anyone, they’re just ticked that I just stole from them.” He glanced back, “I wasn’t expecting the firearms, though.”
“What ?!” Harriet balked, confused.
“Fighting a war with every other secret society takes a lot of money, alright?!” Taylor snapped, “It’s depleted our funds over a couple hundred years, we’ve…hand to resort to petty theft. And sometimes not so petty.”
“You have got to be kidding me.” Harriet groaned, “Who calls an uber to flee a robbery?!”
“Well, clearly I wasn’t expecting this!” Taylor snapped, “Just lose them already!”
“Okay, okay, okay.” Harriet agreed reluctantly, pulling an illegal U-turn, “But I better get a huge tip for this.”
The chase when on for several blocks. Harriet would zig, the other car would zag. Harriet would go over the speed limit, so would the other car. It was surprising neither of them got pulled over by the cops.
“What exactly did you steal from them?!” Harriet demanded, turning another corner into a more isolated part of the city.
“Some little animal figurines.” Taylor answered, looking back, “I didn’t think she’d actually be this mad.”
“Yes, people tend to get mad when you rob them!” Harriet exclaimed.
“This sass is going to affect your tip.” Taylor warned. After a beat he added, “I think we might have actually lost them.”
“Okay.” Harriet breathed, relived, “So, where to now?”
#
Fifteen minutes later, Harriet pulled up to the local motel, of all places, putting it in park.
“Thanks, kid.” Taylor said, beginning to get out of the car.
“Hey!” Harriet called out, “Aren’t you forgetting something?”
“Just—wait here a minute, okay?” Taylor said, “I’ll get you the money.”
Harriet stuck her upper body out of the car window. “And I’m not accepting stolen jewelry! Or figurines, or whatever!” Leaning back into the car, she gripped the wheel with her hands and ungripped it several times, exhaling. Sometimes she hated it when her parents her right.
A few minutes later, Taylor hadn’t come back. Harriet peered in the direction of he went anxiously, a creeping feeling up her spine.
She needed to get out of here.
Harriet hit the gas only for the engine to sputter and spit and do everything but start.
“Not now please!” Harriet pleaded, before getting harsher, “Look, unless you want some company haunting this car, you need to let me drive away—”
Just there was a knock on the door. Harriet whirled around, to see a man with graying black hair knocking on the window. “Sorry about that,” He said in a Scottish accent, “I’m Taylor’s superior, can you step out of the car for a moment?”
Harriet just stared back at him, frozen in her place.
“Now, you won’t be harmed, I promised.” Taylor’s superior said, “We just need to discuss payment for the ride.”
Yeah, right. Harriet thought. If she got out of this car, she either going wind up dead, locked up at the secret headquarters, or forcefully recruited. Possibility some combination of the three.
Suddenly, the lock to car was forced down and the sedan took off.
Only Harriet hadn’t started it. In fact, she hadn’t even turned the car on.
“What?!” Harriet balked. This was new, even for her.
The car turned on, block, then another. Harriet turned black to see a black sedan following them. Here they went again. “Ah, I’m not sure what the plan is, but you might want to go faster.”
As if on cue the car sped up, Harriett having to stop herself from going forward. “Oh, okay…”
#
The car, or at least the poltergeist driving the car, seemed to know what it was doing, taking four evasive maneuvers, driving well after they had lost their pursuers slowing down as they got out of the city, nearing the suburbs, pulling over and coming to a stop a few blocks from home.
“Do you, ah, want me to take it from here?” Harriet asked awkwardly, still processing what was happening.
The horn beeped several times.
“Okay.” Harriett agreed, taking the wheel, “Thanks for the rescue. Seriously, I-I owe you my life.” She was about to put the sedan into drive when she saw a cardboard box on the seat through her rearview mirror. “Look, I’m, ah, I’m still going home,” She assured her new spectral friend as she got out of the car, “There’s just something I need to check on first.”
She opened the back door and tenetively pulled the box to where she could open it, revealing several little animals craved from various colors of agate. Someone was going to be missing these.
#
When Harriet realized she had to return a box of purloined jewelry to someone who shot at her in the street, she was expecting some old-time mobster, or a thug. She was not expecting a frail little old lady with an Eastern European accent.
“You don’t know how much this means to me, my dear.” The old lady said, carefully taking out a red-orange pig and sitting on an end table. “These pieces have been in my family for years.” Looking up she said, “I am, sorry about the, um, unpleasantness yesterday.”
“Yeah,” Harriet responded slowly, standing in the woman’s living room, not sure how to respond. This sweet little old lady had shot at her.
“I never intended to hit you my dear, I only meant to stop the car.” The old lady continued, “I must make it up to you.”
“That’s not really necessary, Miss Kuragin…” Harriet said, slowly backing away.
“Oh, but I must insist,” Miss Kuragin continued, pulling out her purse, “Not to mention thanking you for bringing back my animals. After what happened I wouldn’t blame you if you just threw them out or kept them for yourself.” She pulled out her checkbook.
Well, it’s not as if I’m in any position to turn down any generosity. Harriet thought.
#
Perhaps it was good a thing Harriet took the money, because that evening she learned of a forest in New England that was known in colonial times for harboring ferries that had been the subject of more recent suspect pictures.
“Hey, Eloise,” She called out from her bedroom after getting a good look the pictures, “Feel like a road trip?”
#
The sister left Clive-the name they have given their spectral friend- in a parking lot where the trails started, armed with iron and birdseed walking about halfway before going off the beaten path. “So, what exactly are we looking for?” Eloise asked.
“Rings of mushrooms, earie beautiful music, strange model-gorgeous people with pointy ears and wings dancing around in dated clothing,” Harriet began, “You’re going to want to keep the iron at the ready, and don’t let them get you in a come-hither spell.”
“Uh-huh,” Eloise responded, “And how do I avoid a come-hither spell?”
“I’ll let you know when I figure it out.” Harriet said.
That was when she heard tinkling music and the sound of giggling. They couldn’t have already found something. Could they?
Following it, the sisters looked through the branches of a tree and saw four little women about the size of your average Barbie doll, dressed in loose, dainty dresses that looked like they were made out of pastel spider webs, flying mid-air with wings sprouting from their back.
During her captivity in the fairy court, Harriet had figured out that fairies themselves were roughly the same size as humans and looked more less like humans, except for the features she mentioned to Eloise. Pixies were a different story. They looked like one would think pixies would look like, small and dainty with wings.
They had found a party of pixies.
Harriet looked down at the iron cage attached to her belt. Is she could just get close enough.
“El, be ready to throw the birdseed.”
Harriet readied the cage, and as one with long, copper-colored hair neared her, she lunged, catching the little pixie woman in the cage, and snapping the door shut as she cried out for help. This, of course, got the attention of her friends, who attacked. Harriet swatted at the couple, still managing to keep a good grip on the cage. “El, now!”
Looking like she wasn’t sure about the plan anymore, Eloise tossed a handful of birdseed on the ground in front of the pixies. All fair folk had to count anything thrown in front of them. They couldn’t help themselves.
“Curse you!” One of the female pixies shouted, before flying off to count, allowing Harriet to flee with her squalling prize.
“Somebody beat you to that!” Harriet called back.
The captive pixie continued to scream and wail and tear at the bars of her cage as the sisters ran with her through the forest. “Are you sure this is the best way to do this?!”
“Hey, “Harriet snapped, “Don’t wimp out on me now. Just remember what her people put me through.”
“Alright, but did this specific pixie, do anything to you?” Eloise called back.
They finally made it back to the parking lot, Eloise jumping into the passenger seat as Harriet got into the driver’s seat, handing her the cage before starting the car, only for the car to not start. “Clive? She asked, staring the car again, only to be met with sputtered, “Clive, what are you doing to me, here?!”
A noxious smell filled the car, and the horn began to honk.
Harriet collapsed back into the seat, blowing out a stream of air. “Leave it to me to have the poltergeist with a moral code.”
Meanwhile, the pixie had fallen to the side of the cage, wings dropped hopelessly sobbing pitifully.
As Harriet glanced over to her, her heart sunk, a wave of guilt and compassion washing over. How many times had she been put where this pixie was now? And how many times would she have given anything for someone to help her?
“Give me the cage, El.” Harriet requested soberly, “I can’t break the curse this way.”
Eloise did, and as Harriet reached out to open the cage, the pixie flinched and crawled away in fear. “No, no, no, no….”
“It’s alright, I’m not going to hurt you.” Harriet hushed, “I’m just going to open the door.” She did, and the pixie just stared, frozen in place. “You can come out. “She then opened the car door. “You can go, okay? I’m sorry. I just—” She sighed, “I was desperate, and I got stupid. I know that doesn’t make it right—” She tumbled for words, “I’m just really, really sorry. I won’t stop you from leaving.”
The pixie didn’t have to be told twice, whizzing out of the car.
Harriet slumped in the driver seat. Doing the right thing sucked. What was she going to do now?
Eloise rubbed her sister’s back. “You did the right thing, Hattie.”
Suddenly a slow, cheery song began to play on the radio, causing her to look up. “Thanks, Clive.” Shutting the door she added, “Let’s just get out of here, okay?”
However, then there was a tiny, repeated tap on the window.
“Excuse me?” The pixie called out, “I believe you needed help with a curse?”
#
“Austin?”
That was what came out of Eloise’s mouth as the sisters drove down the highway, Harriet relaying everything the pixie had told her.
“Yeah, that what’s she said.” Harriet confirmed, “Rebecca Donaldson, Austin Texas, Texas Trails Apartments, Apartment 24 G.”
“And how did she figure that out?” Eloise asked.
“Apparently she was able to use my curse to track down the caster.” Harriet explained.
“Alright, well, what’s the plan now?” Eloise asked, “Go to Austin, barge into her apartment and just demand she remove the curse?”
“Pretty much, yeah.” Harriet confirmed.
“Okay, well, how are we going to get her to actually go along with that?” Eloise questioned, “What’s to keep from like, turning you into a squirrel or something?”
Harriet made a face. “Why would she turn me into a squirrel? Is that—is that some kind of literary reference I’m not getting?”
“Ella Enchanted. “Eloise answered, “You’ve seriously never read it?”
“Why would I want to read about more cursed people?!” Harriet balked, “No, I don’t have a plan, but it’s an thirty-two hour drive to Texas. I’m sure we can think of plan in that amount of time.”
#
When they stopped at a no-tell motel at the Tennessee-Arkansas border to sleep, they had yet to think of a plan, and were too exhausted to think of one. So, they decided to take a few days to try to think of one.
“You’ve been researching for months, and you haven’t found anything?” Eloise asked, staring up at the popcorn ceiling.
“Just that salt can nullify her power.” Harriet said, “Only we need her power to lift the curse, but if we let her keep her power there’s no way to guarantee she won’t just whammy the both of us. Fox meet chicken, meet bag of corn.” She sighed sitting up, “I’m going to go get some ice.”
“For what?” Eloise asked.
“I don’t know.” Harriet admitted, “It just beats staring up at the ceiling.”
Shutting the door behind her, Harriet walked over to the ice machine. She grabbed a bag and was opening it up when she heard a thump behind her, and a man’s voice saying, “Come on guys…”
She whirled around, not sure what she was planning to do, and saw two silhouettes, men she thought, pinning a third again a car. As they maneuvered to conveniently be under light from one of the parking lot lamps, Harriet got good enough to realize one of them looked familiar.
No. It couldn’t be…
Then the figure pinned against the car spoke again. “The queen wanted me alive, remember?”
Taylor? What was he doing out here?!
That was when one of his attackers said something unintelligible, revealing a pair or pointy fangs. That was when Harriet caught a glint of red in the man’s iris.
Realizing what was going on, Harriet raced over to Clive, throwing herself inside and gunning it, aiming it towards Taylor and the vampires causing all three of them to jump out of the way as Harriet hit the car. Grabbing a flask of holy water and a sliver stake, she ran over to one of the men who was currently getting up and poured the holy water on him, causing steam to admit from his body and the man to scream. Good. So, she had been right. Otherwise, this could have gotten awkward fast.
Fangs bared, the vampire raised up, hissing, lunging at Harriet, who grabbed the steak and rammed it through the creature’s chest, within a few seconds, the creature turned into powdery dust, staying still like a statue before the dust shattered to the ground.
Did I really just do that? Harriet thought, stunned, Is it a sin to kill a vampire? I mean, it was self-defense, so it’s not like it was murder, but still…
She was pulled from her thoughts when she saw Taylor fighting the other vampire and losing. The creature pinned him against another car. Leaping into action, Harriet jumped his back, causing him to let go in surprise. “What the–?” He slurred.
“Look, don’t make me kill you, too.” Harriet exclaimed, “Just—leave quietly and we can all call it square—wait, are you drunk?” He sounded drunk. He definitely smelled drunk, now that Harriet had a sniff of him.
“Let’s just say if he were human, he’d be dead by now.” Taylor spoke up from where he had fallen to the ground.
Suddenly Harriet found herself flying through the air to the ground, falling on her back with a painful thud, her weapons flying. Managing to get herself into a sitting position, she grabbed the steak.
“You’re not—” The drunk vampire slurred, “You’re not getting away with that, this—”
In a feat of unbelievable lack of coordination, the vampire tripped over his own shoe, falling towards Harriet. Harriet flinched, closing her eyes, only to feel a shower of dust fall over her. Opening her eyes, she looked around and saw she was in a pile of brown dust, and an empty suit of clothes a few inches away from her.
“Did that—really just happen?” Harriet balked, in shock and confused.
Meanwhile, Taylor was getting to his feet, dusting himself off. “Listen I know what this might look like, but um—you!”
“Yes, me,” Harriet snapped, getting to her feet, and trying to dust some of the vampiric remains off her. Yep. She was definitely going to need a shower.
“I almost got demoted because of you and that—that paranormal rust bucket of yours!” Taylor exclaimed, “I’m a laughingstock at the home office and—and—what are you even doing out here?!”
“Trying to stop meeting people like this.” Harriet mumbled, still trying to wipe the dust away, “Oh, ga- it’s everywhere—” As it dawned on her, her head shot up and Taylor’s direction, “Hold up. What are you even doing out here?!” She started marching towards him, “And stealing from vampires? Are you insane!”
“I wasn’t stealing from them!” Taylor exclaimed, “We’re at war with the vampire courts and through a series of unlikely events I became a war prisoner. They were taking me to their queen in Austin.”
“I thought the vampire court was in New Orleans.” Harriet responded.
“They moved the court after The Vampire Dairies got big.” Taylor explained, “These two decided to celebrate their catch, one thing led to another, I tried to escape while they were sloshed and—” He looked around.
“Yeah.” Harriet responded.
After looking at mess for a minute, Taylor said, “Well, thanks for the rescue kid, but, ah—”
As Taylor started to leave, Harriet lept toward him, grabbing him by the ear. “Uh, uh, I’m covered in twelve years of therapy, and Clive’s going to need bodywork. You owe me, and I know just how you’re going to repay that dept.” And with that she dragged him back towards her room.
Just then Eloise opened the girl. “What’s going—” Her eyes opened when she saw the mess outside, “What the WHAT?!”
Harriet marched inside with her prize, tossing him onto the bed.
“Who is that?!” Eloise demanded, closing the door and marching back into the room, “What happened out there?”
“I had an unexpected tussle with a couple of vampires.” Harriet answered, marching towards where she had torn Taylor, “And this is Taylor Harlow, the Illuminati’s weakest link, and he’s going to help us compel Rebecca to break the curse.”
Taylor’s eyes widened. “I’m going to help you make who do what now?!”
#
Fifteen hours later, Harriet and Eloise were sitting in Clive, in the driveway of cozy little cottage, while Taylor was talking to someone at the door. “Have I mentioned this is a terrible idea?”
“Only the whole ride up here.” Harriet said, “Look, I don’t trust Taylor as far as I could throw him, but this opportunity just fell into our laps, we can’t let it get away.”
Just then Taylor got into the backseat, holding a coil of rope, which he handed up from to the girls. “You get this around her; she’ll have to do anything you want or be in some serious pain. So, we good?”
Clive revved the engine.
“We’re good when I can stop running into you.” Harriet said as they took off.
#
The plan was simple. Harriet could go up, knock on the door, and once the witch answered, Eloise and Taylor would get the rope around her.
To do that they had to go their separate ways.
“Alright, this is it.” Eloise said, giving her sister a hug, “See, you on the other side.”
“You, too.” Harriet said, her heart suddenly pounding out of her chest.
“Can we please get this over with?” Taylor complained.
“Good luck to you, too.” Harriet snarked.
As they walked away, Harriet got into the elevator, hitting the button. In a few minutes, her life would really begin.